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10/30/2025 0 Comments October 30th, 2025I used to host a regular "Self-Care Lab" where we'd meet and try different "somatic experiments": trying on different ways of moving, thinking, or feeling and seeing how they affected us. I'm a big fan of gentle life experiments like this.
1. The difference between a general body check-in, and checking for pleasant sensation. One experiment we conducted was taking a few moments to notice where our thoughts naturally went if we checked on our bodies and emotions. Many of the things that folks noticed were the everyday stresses, tensions, and anxieties of life. Then to contrast that, we did a check-in where we specifically looked for anything enjoyable that was happening. Much of the room expressed pleasant surprise at finding different thoughts, sensations, or reactions that felt good- and that in noticing those, the previous anxieties diminished greatly. I'll write up a version of that exercise and post it in the link above. 2. How to use your breath to allow stress to discharge. Christopher Bergland writes a great introduction to some of the ways that modern science and ancient tradition are finally working together. A big part of that is the Vagus nerve. My Somatic Experiencing practice (and most SE practitioners') is highly influenced by the research that shows the vagus nerve to be vital in regulating whether we are in a state of fight-flight or rest-and-relax. Strengthen vagal "tone" and you improve your body's ability to regulate stress, reduce inflammation, and rest the body. One of the ways to strengthen your vagal tone is through certain types of breath, and Christopher shows you how. (hint: the heart rate tends to slow down on the exhale, and speed up on the inhale. Knowing that, how would you adjust your breath if you wanted to encourage your body to slow its heart rate?) 3. Why feeling our strength can be a part of healing. As a massage therapist, I'm often helping people relax. But as a practitioner of Somatic Experiencing, I'm often helping them connect to their strength: their drive, their passion, and even sometimes their anger. This article describes how it can be limiting to only strive for relaxation, because sometimes in order to heal from whatever caused you tension in the first place, the strength and energy behind that tension needs to express itself. I would love to see more people doing the hard work of realizing their strength, and then resting deeply with the satisfaction of knowing that they have the ferocity of a tiger ready to protect them if need be. Have you ever experienced a sense that if you needed to, you could be ferocious? How does that knowledge support you as you move peacefully through the world?
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Over the past nine years as I've studied and trained in Somatic Experiencing, I've started realizing that there are a lot of way to take care of ourselves, mentally, physically, and emotionally, that are highly effective yet not yet 'common sense' in the public sphere. I'd like to share some of these with you.
1. Using your body to lower stress levels. Movement specialist Betsy Polatin offers very simple, yet potent ways of using your body to shift your patterns of stress. Even something as simple as taking your right hand, placing it gently on the skin of your left wrist, and taking a few moments to enjoy the contact of skin on skin can help your breath deepen naturally, and your shoulders begin to relax. 2. Using your unfocused mind to refresh your focus and your will. Author Srini Pillay, M.D. explains the benefits of 'spacing out', and offers guidance on three different ways to space out in the most effective, healing way possible. For example, while you surely know that dwelling on "what you should have said" over and over can stress you, imagining something whimsical like running along a cliffside near the ocean can help you reconnect to your sense of self, and manage change more effectively. Sometimes it can be hard to use these approaches when you're around other people. Our sense of social duty can distract us from taking care of ourselves, and it can be exhausting just to try to stay present with those around us. So, I've written a short article exploring: 3. How to recover yourself even when you're with others. Even something as simple as how you're holding tension in your face can drain you of social energy far faster than you might imagine. And yes, I'm linking to my own blog from 6 years ago, don't judge me! |
AuthorAaron Kapin is passionate about helping others grow more comfortable in the world, more clear on what they want, and more confident in their ability to ask for it. He's spent his entire adult life studying communication, personal growth, and healing arts, and hopes to continue training and growing for a good long while. ArchivesCategories |
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